“My demons are begging me to open up my mouth. I need them, mechanically make the words come out.”– Halsey, Hold me Down
There is often an impending sense of gloom. We don’t know what’s wrong, just that something is. Something doesn’t feel right. In these moments, how do you keep yourself from spiralling? Spiralling down the drain to the point of no return. A place where there is no one but you and your demons.
They (demons) welcome you with open arms. And you can’t help but give in to them. You’ll take any form of comfort you can get. From anyone, you can get. Even them. And so they pull you down into a void with them. They pull you down till you are out of reach. Nothing can help you but you now. But you are exhausted, and you find them comforting. They are there for you when no one else is, and you aren’t sure anymore about whether you want them to leave.
Slowly, they become your identity; they become who you are. They are your second skin. You don’t feel yourself without them. You wonder if it’s wrong to feel this way. You wonder if you should leave. But you are too deep, too lost. And you accept that. You accept it to be your home. You accept them as your home.